I have mixed feelings about being just three weeks away from the start of school. On one hand, I'm eager to get back to a regular routine; to have more hours in the day to get things done, work, and spend some time focusing on myself. On the other hand, I'm really going to miss the carefree days of summer vacay--taking trips to the beach and the pool, soaking up the fun and sun.
Despite my conflicted feelings, I know my kids have a struggle all their own to deal with. Many children experience anxiety at this time, filled with the stress of what starting school again will entail. From bullying and being nervous about making friends and having a new teacher, there’s a lot that can weigh on a child. This stress can continue throughout the school year and have major consequences. According to the American Psychological Association, when children experience chronic stress it can contribute to psychological problems, as well as physical conditions. The good news is that there are plenty of things parents can do to help their child prepare.
There are many things parents can do to help prepare their children emotionally and socially for taking on a new school year.
- Teach kids to embrace progress, rather than perfection. If they feel they have to get perfect grades, for example, they will have a lot of unnecessary stress and anxiety.
- Set your expectations for them based on your values. It’s important to let kids know what you expect for the school year from them, but that you realize there is room for error, too.
- Take the time to talk to your children about your own social mistakes, so they can learn from them. Let them know what mistakes you made and how you would have handled it differently if you could go back in time now.
- Remember that winning isn’t everything. Kids need to learn how to be a team member, and how to lose gracefully. Play games with them where they will lose at times, so they can learn good sportsmanship and resilience.
- Discuss with them what “success” means. Teach them that we all learn through our mistakes on our way to success.
- Kids need to know how to make friends, so discuss with them how to do that. Have your child pick five qualities you would want in a friend and then discuss the list with them. As social issues arise, refer back to that list of core values to see if the relationship is a good fit.
- Have a family discussion about finding balance and discussing how much can be fit into one schedule. This is especially important when it comes to the number of extracurricular activities that can be taken on.
- Make sure your kids know that it’s okay to ask for help.
- Make a social media discussion a priority if your child uses it, ensuring that they use the T.H.I.N.K. acronym regarding what they post online. T (is it truthful), H (is it helpful), I (is it inspiring), N (is it necessary), and K (is it kind).
- Have a discussion about bullying. Remind them that bullying is never okay and that they need to speak up if it happens. Discuss having boundaries, speaking up, being a good role model, and getting help when needed.
- Teach your child coping skills, which will help them be better prepared to handle stress and anxiety.
- Let kids know the importance of focusing on the positives in life. They can do this by keeping a gratitude journal, and having a positive affirmation that they repeat each day.
This is not a sponsored post. Tips by Reena B. Patel (LEP, BCBA) is a renowned parenting expert, guidance counselor, licensed educational psychologist, and board-certified behavior analyst.